by Chili Challis

You see folks, this is what happens when cousins marry!

This is the result of the fetus not getting enough oxygen!

Congratulations! You’re proof that a person doesn’t really need a brain.

I could make a ass out of you but I see somebody already beat me to it.

God I’ll bet your mother had a loud bark!

I don’t know what makes you so stupid but it’s working.

I’m a little busy right now, could I ignore you some other time?

What would we do without hecklers?!! These great one liners (and a 1,000 0thers) would have never existed without them.

I have to admit my strongest shows have come from dealing with a loud mouth and running it through my entire performance. Bless them I say, they have as much right to free speech as we do and belong in comedy history if for nothing else but great fodder to write more funny.

Hey I don’t come to where you work and jump up and down on the bed when you’re trying to earn a living!

C’mon that’s hysterical.

Tips on dealing with hecklers:

A. Always make sure the entire audience can hear what they say. If not repeat it.

B. Be patient. Don’t jump too soon. Let the audience get tired of them as well. And don’t overdo your response.

C. NEVER let a heckler win!

Rodney Dangerfield classic heckler line:

“Save your breath for your inflatable date!”

FUNNY!